Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Need to figure things out
I feel like a worthless blob of nothingness. I sleep all day and don't do anything around the house like I should and I have no energy. What is my purpose in life? I doubt it is this. One positive thing is I went to RCA today and they are starting a Survivors group and and want me to to help start it up. I can do that! I just want to feel like I am doing something important in like besides sleeping. I've talked to my Pdoc and she doesn't have any answers and my regular doctor is no help either. I don't know what to do. Every day I question my worth and have disappointment about the way I am living my life. There is so much noise inside and uneasiness and I feel so guilty because I should be striving to make a happy life for everyone and I'm not. I give into the sleep. And when I do I have nightmares that are horrific in nature it's a no win situation. I want to escape life yet I want to embrace it. What is stopping me?