But if anyone causes these little one's who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Matthew 18:6
We believe sin passes through the generations. While we cannot humanly stop sinning we can break the cycle of a particular sin. Incest has run its course through our fathers family for years and years. We used to blame ourselves and think that we did something wrong. We felt by "allowing" the abuse to take place we were just as guilty. Not true! Like the above Bible passage says, "If anyone CAUSES these little ones to sin" they are the guilty ones. Jesus was talking about children here. By our abusers molesting us we were CAUSED to sin. We did not participate willingly but out of fear.
We believe our fathers sins were brought upon him the same way they were brought upon us. The difference is choice. Choosing to follow in the family sin or turning our back on it. We chose the latter by speaking out, making the family aware of its sickness. What an amazing turn the family takes when confronted with the ugliness that has been cloaked for all these years. It is almost as if a death has taken a family member. The reaction range from denial (usually the first emotion) to anger to fear to shame. The family may become divided. Those who believe and support the accuser and those who don't believe and shun the accuser.
The sins of our fathers will continue to pass down the family line unless we gather up our courage and speak out! We need to make it a personal campaign for ending the cycle of abuse in our families! We can do this by confronting the abuser(s)and letting family and friends know what has happened to us. If your abuser is no longer living you can still confront them by writing a letter as if they were still here. Read it out loud (with a support person) and then burn the letter. Let our your anger, rid yourself of the festering wounds of the past! If you haven't reached the point that you can do or say anything we suggest you practice how you will take action when you are ready. Write in your journal, talk in the mirror (as if it is your abuser standing there), role play with a support person. When the day comes you will know when it's right and you will be prepared and will be strong! It's a long, hard battle but you can do it! Realize you are making history which will open up your future and help your family repair the damage for the next generation.